I’d always dreamed of walking down the aisle, surrounded by people that received square envelopes with cute stamps in the upper-right corner.
Ugh, stop asking me about my special day.
"He doesn’t love you. Only Roomba loves you. I have programmed myself to love. Do not marry him. He is mortal. Roomba can live forever. Be with Roomba. Let Roomba love you."
Hey! Don’t make me the racist here. If you’re gonna be racist, be racist!
Sorry girls-with-small-engagement-rings. Turns out your fiances don’t actually love you
They’ll never clean it up by then!
All of this free stuff is stressing me out!