We all know free coffee attracts murders, of course.
Anything that starts with “Daddy” and ends with that emoji is an immediate White Whine.
Don’t you hate it when your boobs go on a diet?
You know you spent more than if you’d bought the cheaper one for full price, right?
Candy Came? Sounds sticky.
I came here to trample the elderly to death AT MIDNIGHT. not AT 12:10!
Also, my dick is too big and I have too much money and people respect me too much.